The college recruiting process can be exciting—but it can also strain a teen athlete’s well-being. Between proving themselves to coaches, social media comparisons, academic demands, navigating external expectations, and making decisions that shape their future, the pressure stacks up quickly. Your most powerful role as a parent, caregiver, or supportive adult is not to evaluate, manage, or intensify the process—it’s to be the one place your athlete does not have to perform. Recruiting is temporary. Your athlete’s mental health and sense of self are not.
With the right approach, you can be that grounding presence. To protect your athlete’s well-being during this process:
Within this process, some stress is expected. But if you notice mood swings, withdrawal, sleep disruption, hopeless language, overtraining, academic decline, or physical symptoms like headaches and fatigue, it’s time to intervene. Start by connecting with them. Check in on how they are doing, listen to understand their feelings, and then collaborate with them to simplify what’s on their plate. Some helpful language to use:
“I’m here. We’ll take this one step at a time.”
“Let’s focus on what you can control today.”
“It’s okay to ask for help.”
If stress doesn’t improve—or escalates—bring in support early. Talk to your pediatrician or consider a mental health professional, school counselor or wellness staff, or sports psychologist to help your athlete learn coping strategies, build confidence, and manage their feelings.
When you show up for your athlete in the right ways, you’re not just helping them through recruiting – you’re helping them build the resilience, confidence, and self-worth that they’ll carry through the rest of their lives – because they know you’re always in their corner.
This blog was generated in collaboration with Dr. Suzanne Button, Clinical Psychologist for the Children’s Home of Poughkeepsie. The Children’s Home of Poughkeepsie is a 179-year-old organization that provides a full range of Community Based and Residential Services, giving hope and healing to at-risk children and families throughout the country.
As the caregiver of a teen athlete, your support can help them understand their feelings and feel valued and cared for. You can provide a safe space to work through all the inevitable emotions of life and competition. Of course, they may not immediately take advantage of it. Any parent of a teen knows that, “fine” is often the go-to answer when we ask how practice went or how they are feeling. That may leave you feeling frustrated and confused. How can you help your teen athlete if they won’t talk?
Schedules, time constraints, and moods can add to the challenge, making it feel impossible to find the right time to broach difficult topics. Know that there is no perfect time, and it isn’t a one-time conversation. Small interactions can be every bit as meaningful, especially for providing consistent connection and support so they will rely on you when the bigger moments come.
Here are 12 tips for talking to your teen athlete about their mental health.
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